Driving home tonight I had to hit the brakes sharply to avoid hitting a cat on highway 55. The daredevil cat made across all 4 lanes of traffic and no Detroit steel was harmed in the saving of the feline. However, during the short-stop something rolled out from under my seat and smacked me in the foot. When I pulled into the grocery store parking lot a few miles farther down the road I took a look beneath the brake pedal to see what it was.
A nice big red spanish onion.
Apparently I bought Mr. onion whenever I last shopped, loaded him and the rest of his grocery gang into the back seat of my car and he rolled out, and I somehow, never missed him. I guess I should just be glad it happened, it would have been just awful if it had started to rot under my seat..bleh.
So, I started thinking about the things in my life that I'll let go, and the things that have to be a certain way. For example, and, no, I really can't believe I'm saying this out loud, but every week night I have to set up my coffee pot for the next day morning and not just the pot, coffee, and filter part but the cup, the spoon, a paper towel and the correct number of splenda packets must be laid out on the counter. If whatever I'm cooking for dinner can be left, the dog and I go out and get the mail together, and we play fetch in the front yard exactly 4 times; 2 on the way down to the street; 2 on the way back. I can't leave dirty dishes in the kitchen sink all night. I've tried and it always ends up with me laying in bed thinking about my dirty dishes. I have to turn on the dishwasher just before I go to bed. When I turn on the dishwasher, the light over the stove must go on. This is a light bulb I have extras of at all times. In the morning, I'll have to empty the dishwasher while the coffee is brewing and yes, as a matter of fact, it is very upsetting if the coffee finishes before me.
Somehow though, making sure my perishable, paid for groceries make it from the car into my home, eh, not so important. And people, I'm a list maker, I don't walk into a grocery store, ever, and wing it. I make lists, I cross things off as I put them in my basket. Why wouldn't I notice a missing onion? An onion crossed off my list, no doubt.
I'd love to say this is the only time that something like this has happened, but I can't. A few months ago, I drove to a work-luncheon thing and my boss kindly pointed out a full yogurt wedged firmly under the passenger seat. Just a few weeks ago, I had lunch with bloggers, Tiff, Kenju, and Renn, and I somehow left half of a very good turkey wrap thingie, that's right, under my car seat. This evening, upon further investigation, I also found roughly 25 multivitamins completely adhered to the carpet under the passenger seat (this one is a real mystery as I have no idea how they got there); one flip flop and in the passenger seat pocket, I found CD's I either didn't know I owned or that I don't own, (but to whom they should be returned I have no earthly idea); six ballpoint pens, four sharpies, and a tube of toothpaste. I have zero recollection of actually putting these items here, nor at any time during the unloading did I think "I'm so glad I put that there, I'm such a very smart girl." No, most of the time I thought "what the hell? where did this come from?"
I also count my steps, pretty much everywhere I go, I can tell you exactly how many steps it is from my bedroom to my garage door, or my front door to my back door, or my garage door to my mailbox, or from my office to the bathrooms. My brain has somehow determined this crap to be important information, but also it doesn't trust itself, because we have to do it every time.
I'm feeling a little nuts tonight. I'm also feeling like maybe I understand why some of those relationships didn't work out so well. It wasn't that I didn't listen to what they were saying to me, I just couldn't hear them over all the incessant counting.
Shut up. You people are weird too. I know it.